Thursday, April 28, 2011

White teeth and ugly shoes.

Have I ever mentioned how much I LOVE shopping?! I love a good deal more than anything. I love finding something spectacular even if I don't need it. I should probably learn some self control but as long as I'm getting my bills paid I should be able to play with the rest right? :)

Furthermore, one of my coworkers came in with these ridiculous, or so I thought, shoes on. She kept ranting and raving about how bad ass they were, insert roll of eyes upon listening to this. So being the sucker that I am I decided to go try a pair of these bad boys on. Shoe store attempt number one: they only carried size 6, 7, & 11 where the hell did 8-9-10 go? Attempt: fail. Shoe store attempt number two: only children sizes. Attempt: fail. Shoe store attempt number 3&4: negative. Didn't carry em. Shoe store attempt number 5: BINGO BITCHES!!! My size, my color and 20 bucks cheaper than the before mentioned...all of a sudden I have happy feet and these shoes don't seem so ridiculous anymore. Ever heard of "skeletoes" by Fila? Yeah me neither, the name sounds lame enough. Without further adieu, I present you with my happy feet with ridiculous attire, yet somehow they're amazing.

Told you they were ridiculous. Judge me not! At least try em on first then you'll beg to differ.

Moving on.

So not only did I buy these hideous awesome shoes, I also went tanning today and made a purchase. The tanning salon I go to every once in awhile features "Customer Appreciation Day" which consists of being able to lay in any bed you please for free and it doesn't count against your minutes. Also on this day all products are 30% off. I'm stocked on lotion and tanning bed teeth whitener but for the days I don't tan, I still want to whiten my teeth and I hate white strips. Dilemma? Not anymore.

I use twilight teeth in the tanning bed, for those of you who aren't following me on this... let me elaborate: you put a mouth guard in that holds your mouth open for your pearly whites or soon to be to show. You apply the gel to your teeth and then get in the tanning bed and the uv lights do the rest. And wah lah! White(r) teeth. So now when I'm at home and don't tan this little package comes with a small attachable uv light to whiten your teeth regardless if I'm in the tanning bed or not. This little diva is happy.

Speaking of tanning bed, I stink. Its time for this tanned, white teeth, and happy footed diva to shower. :)

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Ticking time bomb

I don't know if it has to do with the fact that I haven't been consuming many calories, today was the last day of my period, or if people in general today are just pissing me off. I want to throw up my fuck you finger and say fuck off.

I seriously could go ape shit on somebody today but instead I'll sit here on my back porch and smoke cigarettes and hide from the world while getting lost in blognation. By the way, I'm pissed off that I can't find another blog to stalk. But that's another story in itself.

I started my day fabulous. With rainbows and butterflies and all that cheerful bullshit. I even left a note for my employee to not talk about negative shit when I got back to the store because I wanted to have a good day. Lo and behold, when I get back she starts talking about her brothers cancer and how horrible the weather has been and yada yada. Yes, I feel bad for her bro having cancer and yes I agree the weather sucks... But what the fuck dude? So much for some positive energy. That flew out the window as soon as I walked in and she opened her mouth.

I'm in a cynical mood. I don't give a fuck about anything. And everything is pissing me off and I'm dropping the F bomb like it was recently added to my vocabulary and it's my best discovery yet.

If it wasn't for these diet pills I would drink a whole bottle of wine and pass the hell out. But instead I cant consume alcoholic beverages to better my mood and I cant go to sleep because it's like I'm on speed everyday till 8PM.

Maybe I'll be cheerful tomorrow, one could only hope (and one being my coworker that works with me tomorrow). Till then, this pissed off diva is one hell of a ticking time bomb. Boom.

Monday, April 25, 2011

Monday madness: a to do list from Diva Hell.

via google images

Though my Monday is starting off with me drinking a cup of coffee even though I'm not suppose to consume caffeine on my diet pills and enjoying a pack couple of cigarettes which amounts to anything but madness, I will still post a monday madness due to the craziness going on in my head. Still with me? (think about it...waiting for answer...) okay good.

My Monday routine is jacked. I have no routine. Normally it consists of me being lazy, not doing much of anything more than smoking cigarettes and lounging on the couch, healthy...I'm aware. Today however not so much. I work night shift tonight, which I like to call the bitch shift because it consists of doing all the bitch work for the stores but I'm not going to complain about the extra hours. Due to a death in one of my employees family I will be working tonight and due to another employees prom I will be working Saturday night as well. Extra hours, check. Lack of rest, check. Lack of time to get done what I need to get done....check.

to do number one:I need to get my nails filled, and yes that's important. Are you forgetting I'm a diva to the truest form of all divaness?
to do number two:I need to go tanning, see response to first task on my to do list.
to do number three:I need to go to the gym, because thats what fat ass divas need to do in order to become a sexy diva that her honey can't even resist pouncing on her when she walks through the door. And yes that just came out of my little blogging fingertips.
to do number four:I need to pickup my dinners for the night shifts I work so I don't end up indulging in fast food. See task three.
to do number five:I need to pickup my medicine(s). (a.) so I don't turn into a crazy diva. (b.)so I don't turn into a pregnant diva.
to do number skip this number because I hate it:load my easter pictures to facebook. Because any facebooker knows that this is important, don't judge me.
to do number seven:make an Easter blog post because you're dying to see what a diva Easter is like.
to do number eight:try to remember, or create for that matter, more pointless extremely important tasks for me to not get accomplished. See tasks 1-7.

Now that I've wasted taken up your blog stalking time, I will now end this post by telling you that I hope you have a fabulous week. :)

Saturday, April 23, 2011

John 11:25

Happy Easter everyone! I know I'm posting a little early but I will probably be too busy tomorrow to do so. I hope everyone has an awesome Easter Sunday and remembers what Easter is really all about and celebrates accordingly. And no, I'm not talking about the one foot chocolate Easter bunny in your child's Easter basket! Ha!

Friday, April 22, 2011

honey bee

On Wednesday I went over to Honey's hive (or house for those of you who didn't catch on haha) and he told me he wanted me to hear a song. Now before I post lyrics I'm going to go ahead and throw it out there that Honey reads my blog and even has it as a tab on his google chrome (because apparently he's too cool for internet explorer lol). He actually gets on to me and tells me things like, "it's been like what? A whole month since you posted!" or "so when are you going to blog again?". So therefore he knows he's listed as "Honey" and not his real name so upon hearing this song I'm sure he couldn't wait for me to give it a listen. For you country music fans, get excited I'm giving you a bit of Blake Shelton!

Girl I been thinkin’ ’bout us
And you know I ain’t good at this stuff
But these feelings piling up won’t give me no rest
This might come out a little crazy
A little sideways, yeah maybe
I don’t know how long it’ll take me
But I’ll do my best

Chorus 1:
If you’ll be my soft and sweet
I’ll be your strong and steady
You be my glass of wine
I’ll be your shot of whiskey
You be my sunny day
I’ll be your shade tree
You be my honeysuckle
I’ll be your honey bee

Yeah that came out a little country
But every word was right on the money
And I got you smilin’ honey right back at me
Now hold on ’cause I ain’t done
There’s more where that came from
Well you know I’m just havin’ fun
But seriously

Chorus 2:
If you’ll be my Louisiana
I’ll be your Mississippi
You be my little Loretta
I’ll be your Conway Twitty
You be my sugar baby
I’ll be your sweet iced tea
You be my honeysuckle
I’ll be your honey bee

Your kiss just said it all
I’m glad we had this talk
Nothin’ left to do but fall in each other’s arms
I could’ve said a “I love you”
Could’ve wrote you a line or two
Baby all I know to do
Is speak right from the heart

Chorus 1

Chorus 2

I’ll be your honey bee

He'll be my honey bee eh? Sure enough he definely is.

On a side note, that is actually totally off subject- but still about Honey, we were laying in bed chitty chatting like we normally do and we started talking about Easter. Well a month ago I went ahead and purchased his two nephews and his niece a little basket each filled with goodies. He said something about them and not forgetting to take them with him on his trip to Dover. Then he dropped it. The two words I never expected to come from his mouth without a wedding ring upon my finger. He called me, "Aunt Haley" in reference to his niece/nephews...not my nephew...his. Say what!? I didn't know what to say I was thrown off and I'm sure he could tell. I don't know if it was a joke or of it was in all seriousness but either way I love all three of those kids and in the end it really doesn't bother me so much.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Noise pollution

If everyone listened and followed the advice their momma gave them, "if you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything at all" the world's noise pollution would be cut in half.

If this looks familiar with any of you it's because it was my facebook status today. Lately at work there has been so much she said he she said (because I work with all females) bull shit going on. What sucks the most is the one person that I thought had my back, I recently found out is doing quite the opposite. After letting it bother me all day, I came to the realization that its really not worth it in the end. I'm not going to get upset, I'm not going to get angry... I'm going to let it be; it is what it is. Does this make me weak? Maybe in some peoples definitions but to me I'm going to be the bigger person. I now know the boundaries set in place by this person and I will forever and always keep those in the back of my mind.

I've also realized that I will always, and I do mean always, be looked at as the bosses daughter. Some, and most, people think that this comes with the best perks in the world. Though it may come with perks, the cons much out weigh all else. They don't have to answer to anything and everything small or large that goes wrong. When they go home for the day they get to leave work at work, unfortunately my work stays in my blood stream. In the end I know that it amounts to nothing less than jealousy.

I'm not going to bad mouth or say anything that I wouldn't say to someones face. If others want to continue to do so about me, that's fine. God is on my side and I have a family that will forever and always stick beside and behind me through thick and thin. Unlike them, I will lay my head down on my pillow at night still holding onto my dignity and self respect. I feel its rather sad and unfortunate that others do not get to do the same because of the choice of words that they decided to let leave their lips and expose into the world.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Skinny Diva and shortage of time

So what has the diva bee been up to? Literally everything! From losing weight to spending time with Honey to working and loving on Jacob Riley I have pretty much no time for anything. It's recently become extremely apparent to me that 24 hours doesn't make a long enough day for me. Too much to do and no time to do it. Friday I just ended up having a breakdown and balling my eyes out for no apparent reason. I really needed to get off work early in order to do my two and a half weeks mountain of laundry that is starting to take up all my space to even move. So I guess my breakdown was targeted from being smothered, if you're catching my drift. My only solution to this mayhem would be to have a place of my own. If I had a place of my own I would be there more often and I wouldn't have to worry about occupying the washer and dryer. I could wash before I went to work and dry after work. Simple solution? I wish. I don't really plan on moving out till I see where mine and Honey's relationship goes. I don't see the point in living alone and paying rent if A. I can live at home for free and B. I'm always at his house. Granted if I did have a place he would probably be over there instead of the vice versa but as for right now I'm staying planted until we decide to make that big jump in our relationship. it would be pretty nice though...

On to other, more exciting, stuff... Jacob Riley is getting so big! He's so so sweet, truly he is. My sister can pretend to be crying and he will run over to her and give her the biggest hug. Prolly the most precious child I've ever met, and I'm going to put aside that you probably read that as being bias lol!

Skinny diva? Yes please! This stuff is amazing so far anyways... Naturally I'm an extremely tired person. I always have been, since birth till now. Not with this bad boy. It gives me crazy amounts of energy and after my first day of taking it I quickly realized why the bottle says to not consume any additional caffeine. Today starts my second week and I've already lost 5lbs. (it would have been more but this weekend I made poor choices in meals as well as consumed several high cal beers) but overall I feel great. Needless to say the extra energy boost that it provides makes me much more willing to workout after I get off work. If you have had prior heart problems or anything of that sort I highly recommend speaking with your physician before use. You can buy OxyElite Pro from GNC or Vitamin World or do like I did to save a quick buck, buy it off of *I was not endorsed for this product review nor was I asked by any USPlabs employee to do so.

Now after that word-full spill, I would tell you all about how amazing Honey and I are doing but I think I will save that for your entertainment in a later post. Till then, I'll leave you with one of our latest pictures :)

Go ahead and leave plenty of comments telling me how gorgeous of a couple we make. Flatter me a little, I won't be mad ;)