Goodbye 2010. Hello 2011.

I don't know about y'all but I am shocked that it's already been a year. Where has time gone? I can't say that it's been the best year, I can't say that it's been the worst. However I can say that there's not a moment that went by where I didn't LIVE. With all my might I tried to make the most out of everything this year. I won't say that I don't have any regrets but I will say that I learned from my mistakes. There's been highlights...there's been lowlights... but I want to ring in the new year focusing on the highlights and what made this year what it was. So without further adieu I present to you the top 10 highlights of 2010.

10. Jacob Riley had his very first birthday party.
9. I let go of relationships that were ultimately not healthy for me.
8. I rekindled a relationship that has been damaged for quite some time.
7. I took on a new job with a new role and a new partner. (along with the responsibilities)
6. I grew into the person that I want to be. The person that I was meant to be.
5. I met an incredible person through the blogging experience and even though we don't communicate as we once did, this person will always lay heavy on my heart.
4. I made it to my 22nd birthday, therefore I made it out of 21...huge highlight for me.
5. Someone came into my life that made me realize settling is never again going to be an option. What I want is out there I just had/have to wait for it.
4. I have successfully owned my own car and made payments on it for a full year without ever once being late on a payment.
3. I grew a backbone. I'm not going to say much more about this one.
2. Several babies were born and several vows were made.
1. I finally let go of the past.


Maybe my list isn't as extraordinaire as others but for me each one of the above listed has greater detail and meaning than listed. I also want to congratulate everyone that has given birth this year or found they're pregnant. (I feel like this year everyone I know had a child or became pregnant and that even includes the friends I have made through blogging. ) so congratulations. I hope everyone has a happy new year and I'll see ya on the other side :)

The kissable best friend

So by the time i got home last night from work I was ready to just fall over! Monday i worked an 8hr shift then Tuesday a 13hr and Wednesday a 13hr. It wouldn't have been so awful it all the hours werent compiled so close together. So nevertheless, due to these odd hours i haven't been able to see K since Sunday. With any other guy I've ever previously dated I would've been devastated but with K it's like i really don't have to worry about it because i know as soon as I see him it's going to be amazinggg. My dad and i were actually talking about it last night and it's like everything between me and K is so simple. Every other guy has always had his baggage and our relationship has always been complicated. I know I'm doing some comparing here but everything with K is so different then anything I've ever experienced before. We just enjoy being around each other and having fun. We don't argue or get jealous or anything. It's just like I'm hanging out with my best friend... a best friend that is extremely attractive and kissable of course ;)

I've been trying to refrain from saying too much about him because I'm petrified of jinxing myself or making myself look like a fool when it doesn't work out (don't get me wrong I'm really hoping for the best here...). However I want to scream from the rooftops and tell everyone how amazing he is, to me anyways. Truth be told I'm happier now than I have been in a long time.

A quick note

So if you've been reading my blog for a while now then you know that when it comes to me posting on my computer, I have serious issues. Anyone remember when I talked about getting a new laptop? Well hello procrastinating tight-wad! I keep putting it off because in all honesty I hate spending large amounts of money at once. It literally causes me anxiety with a side dish of nausea.

HOWEVER! I am proud to announce that I did it. I ended up not buying a laptop nor desktop. I actually went with an iPad instead. Talk about blogging on the go! Ha! So happily I can say that I will now be blogging more frequently, unless time prohibits.

Ps. If you're looking at buying an iPad and need a second opinion: DONT HESITATE! Buy one! I love mine and I've had it less than 24 hours! Hehe.

the meeting

Why is it that every time something seems so right, I want to pick up my heels and run like hell? It's this never ending cycle. When something is so good in my life it's like I want to screw it up so it fits in with everything else. I think I'm losin' it.

Other news, I met the parents yesterday... and the sister... and the nieces and nephews. Oh and the home town friends, paster, youth group partner, and the whole youth group. It was different. It's almost like I went back in time when I was a little girl. My hometown use to be super small and nonexistent just like K's was. It's like being around people who just like being around one another. No walmart. No mall. No fast food on every corner. Mom and pop stores filled the roads where empty woods didn't. It felt like home. Red lights consisted of people honking their horns at one another just to say hello. At one point we were at a stop sign and K honked his horn at a man in a truck and they waved just like they saw each other yesterday. Come to find out it was the husband of a woman who took care of K when he was younger.

The meeting of the parents went far from expected. They're just good ole backwoods people with nothing to lose but love and faith.

Honestly, I loved every minute of it.

Merry Christmas y'all!

I hope everyone is having an amazing Christmas!! I know I am.

I have everything I want.
Amazing family
Amazing God.
Amazing man.

Tomorrow K -the guy Im dating- and I are going to his home town which is about 45 minutes away from where we live to go to church. He goes every Sunday however I have yet to go with him because that means I'll be meeting his parents. That's right tomorrow I'm meeting the parents! Talk about nervous. He doesn't understand why I'm so nervous because he's already met my parents and my sister. However, I had to explain to him that he went into meeting the parents not knowing that it could potentially be a deal breaker if they didn't like him, he on the other hand let me know upfront that he couldn't be with someone if his parents didn't like "her". So why wouldn't I be nervous!? Nevertheless I will be meeting them tomorrow and aside from my nerves I'm excited to see what makes him who he is. Can I just say that I'm overly thrilled that were going to church together. I've always wanted a guy that is willing to go to church with me and most say they will and then gripe about it later. So the fact that he asked me to go with him to his church made me ever so excited!!! The fact that he even has a church is even better!! Ah. Okay I'm going to calm down now cause I get all girly and giggly when talking about him it's kind of ridiculous. Haha.

Anyways I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas and a happy new year if I don't write before then :)

something new...

All that I've wanted for so long could possibly be here. I've wanted it for so long that I don't want to say too much and jinx it but I will say this, I am truly happy where I'm at right now.

I use to judge people who used dating websites. I actually laughed and thought that they were desperate. In the end is desperation measured by what lengths we will go to in order to find what we really want in life? If so, I'm desperate and I'm not ashamed to say so. I've hidden the fact that I joined a dating website because in reality I didn't want people thinking that I couldn't get a date on my own without using internet resources. However, I have come to a smarter, more realistic conclusion. There's no reason to be ashamed. By joining I cut through the crap and got down to what I was really wanting. I can't count how many dates I've been on and questioned myself on what the other person was really looking for. By dating via Internet I cut straight to the point. There's no wondering involved you know what they want i.e. sex, dating, long term. Though my best friend even gave me crap for it, she ended up joining just to see what it was like and what do ya know she's dating someone now that she actually met from there. HA!

Anyways so this is how the story goes: I had been on the site for probably 6 months. I talked to two guys in the that time frame, nothing serious. However this one profile kept showing up on my matches and something kept intriguing me about his picture. However, his picture had a kid in it and I'm not really into dating someone with children due to a prior bad experience. So I never clicked on his profile to even view it. Three months later I still keep seeing him pop up but now he has a different picture. So I finally click on his profile just to read what he's about however I never read whether or not he had children because subconsciously I had my mind made up that he did. Well not too long ago I read his profile one last time. Come to find out it's his niece and nephews. Also come to find out he goes to church every Sunday and sits with his grandfather then heads to his grandmas to eat breakfast and hang out with his niece and nephews. Godly man? Family man? ...you had me from hello! Ha.

So I messaged him and long story short we went on our first date which maybe one day I will go into more detail about. However I will say this, we were both so nervous that he even took his anxiety medication and brought a back up. Everything went great we've seen each other several times since and we text all day/night.

I'm super excited about this one.
However, in all honesty, I'm scared as hell.

stronger than today

Have you ever randomly thought about the random stuff you love? The random things in life that make you smile, laugh, or entertain you? I've been doing a lot of that lately. Considering I'm going through a rough time right now and all I have to talk/think about is negative stuff I figure what better subject to post about than the random goodies in life. ....look I'm searching for a positive in a pile of negs, if I sniff one out I'm taking it! So here we go my random list of things that make smile, laugh, and right out entertain me.

1. Two and a Half Men. Has anyone ever watched this!?! I've never been huge on sitcoms but omg I could watch it all day. It makes me chuckle. And tonight as I was waiting for it to come on I came across another show that made me laugh, which is hard to do right now so you know it's gotta be good, How I Met Your Mother. Good stuff right there.

2. You know that one pocket in your purse that you know could be useful for something however you never seem to take use of it? (I like to call it "My Forgotten Pocket"....not really but it makes for a good name). Anywaysss so today I went to grab something (I cant remember what now) from the pocket beside the forgotten pocket however my hand slipped in the forgotten pockets instead. And what did my little fingers find!?!?! A twenty dollar bill. Oh how I will start visiting the forgotten pocket more now. :-)

3. Infomercials. Don't ask I don't know why. Let's take the bare minerals infomercials... one of my favorites... I love watching them making over the girls. Normally I get the kick out of the ones pertaining to all things beauty. I don't know they just make me smile. Next....

4. When you discover a great deal. Who doesn't? So self-explanatory.

5. When you realize someone cares more than you thought they did. Though this person has been in my life since day one, I never knew how much she cares and is willing to stick by me until now. She's really shown me a lot within the past 24hrs and for the simple fact that she has continuously checked up on me within the past 24hrs means more to me then she'll ever know.

Okay for now I'm going to try to catch some zZzZzZz's.

Tomorrow will be better, tomorrow I'll be stronger, because by tomorrow I will have grown from today.

the hurt

My heart hurts. I keep trying to put on a pretty little smile and pretend everything is okay yet in the end it's not.

Have you ever literally had the physical pain deep down in your chest? The one where for a couple of minutes you feel as if you could potentially be experiencing heart failure?

It hurts.
Physically.
Emotionally.
Mentally.

gobble, gobble...

Yeah yeah... I went on a mini blogcation again. So much has been going on, once again... with work. My partner went on maternity leave, therefore everything that use to be handled with four hands was being handled with just two. Those two hands were my own. Stress overload, multiple migraines, and a full plate (and this plate wasn't filled with turkey and dressing...). Speaking of! HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

This year the family came to my house. After two days prep it was over in the blink of an eye. I guess that's the way it always goes. Anyways... this was Jacob Riley's first year to eat a thanksgiving meal. Unfortunately he was a bit under the weather so I don't think he got the chance to enjoy to the full capacity. Poor baby. Needless to say, he currently has six stitches in his chin from falling and busting it open. Once they're mobile... they're mobile... lol.

Anywho, I'm not going to post a novel because I'm watching some show on NBC about the people of the year. Currently they're featuring Justin Timberlake, and in my opinion that's definitely something to look at ;) hehe...

So goodnight lovelies, happy thanksgiving, and oh, PS! be careful and have fun shopping on the ultimate shopping day: BLACK FRIDAY!

Jacob Riley+Giveaway+No Work

First and foremost, hooray for giveaways! I loveee them! I just recently entered Bailey's giveaway where two lucky winners would recieve a set of social networking buttons. Guess what? (i'm sure you've already figured out by this point, but let's not spoil the fun) I WONNNN!!! Hooray hooray! If it were anyone else posting this giveaway with another designer, chances are I probably wouldn't have entered. However, considering Bailey is extremely easy to work with and is an AMAZING designer I jumped on this like a cheetah in hightops! If you're ever interested in getting a professional blog design or even redesigning your blog, I would HIGHLY recommend her. You can go here for all the details on how to get a bad ass blog design! ;)

Furthermore, yesterday was intense. I woke up at 5AM to go in to work and didn't get off til 8PM. I was ready to fall out when I got hope, which is exactly what I did. Today was a waste! The most productive thing I did today was take a shower, and it was like pulling teeth to even get up and make myself do just that. Lazy much? Honestly, I can't tell you the last time I took a day off from every aspect in my crazy life. I did what I wanted to do all day long, which was just sit, that's it... just sit. Others would go get a pedicure, manicure, massage, even go shopping. However, all of that seems like a large task to me lately just because I don't have time to ever just sit. Sit and breathe for a whole day. Let me tell you, I couldn't have asked for a better day... minus the aches and pains created from working long hours in a body that isn't getting any younger, but hey that's life!

So have I ever told ya'll that I sleep naked? I have to. I can't sleep in clothes, I've tried a million and a half times! Yet, somehow I have an obsession with pajamas! I just bought an awesome set of j's that I literally wash repetitively so I can wear them every night. One of these days when I have time, I'm going to buy several more pairs. I love them because the pants you can either where them as capri's or full length and the shirt you can wear either three quarter length or long sleeve! Needless to say they're comfy, and kinda cute ;) Seee:

Told ya so. So anyways, moving on to the most important subject of this post. Jacob Riley! So today in day care his teacher was reading a book about farm animals. The teacher started making different farm animal noises and all of a sudden Jacob, 11 months old, goes "Mooo". How freaking adorable, do you know how much money I would have paid in order to see that! I love me some Jacob Riley, like nobodys business! Speaking of him being 11 months, Jacob Riley turns 1 on October 26th! Woo Hoo! Because of this, I will be hosting a giveaway sometime closer to the end of this month. Meanwhile, I have to figure out what I'll be giving away and the exact date that I'll be giving it. So anyways that's something to look forward too! Oh and also... look out for day 3 of 10 Days of Digging Deeper! It'll be popping up sometime soon =)

tick, tock, stop the clock!

Where exactly is the time going? Does anybody know, anybody? I seriously have so much that I need to do and so much that I want to do. Here's where I'm suppose to weigh out which is more important of the each tasks but let's be honest... I just want to crawl in bed and sleep, totally forget that time even exists or that I even have anything to do. Unfortunately, I don't have time for that. However I did finish my fall cleaning in my bedroom, so that's a big chip of the shoulder... and one less thing on my never ending to do list. I need more time! Time, time, time

I don't know if I've ever explained or even mentioned that I am the manager at my job and that I share my title with one other person, C. C just had a baby two Sunday's ago so all of the management responsibilites are now on my plate. Tomorrow I will be working a triple shift: opening + day shift + night shift= 13 hours of work. Plus all the little things that I need to get done adds up to be a pretty busy/exhausting day.

On a lighter note, I went to the Titans game on Sunday! :) This time J didn't go with, instead I took M, on of my employees. We had a blast even though it was a crappy loss, at least I got some pretty cute pictures from it! Ha! I was going to post some but photobucket is kind of being retarded right now. So once I have them all uploaded into one file, I'll show em to ya! ;)

Till then, I'm going to end this pointless post by telling you all that I hope you have a wonderful rest of the night and a fabulous Wednesday tomorrow!

Wee Bit Wednesday

A day late!

Ummm two posts in less than an hour? what-evaaa I gotta lotta say!



{one} what is your biggest pet peeve?
I have a lot, so to say the BIGGEST would be hard to choose just one. So I'm going to go with... walking through wet grass (obviously in sandals where the grass actually touches me feet) lol.


{two} what is your favorite dessert?
Cheesecake!


{three} what is the first thing you notice about people?
pretty much their overall appearance... different things stand out on different people... or maybe I'm wierd


{four} are you usually late, early or right on time?
depends on the occasion lol but mainly late heh...heh...


{five} have you ever fired a gun?
does a paintball gun count?


{six} are you right-handed or left-handed?
rightyyy

{seven} which do you prefer: coke or pepsi?
diet COKE, regular PEPSI


{eight} do you dance crazy when no one is looking?
all the timeee! one time i was dancing in my car at a red light, not thinking anyone was watching... I then looked over to find myself being video taped by the people in the car beside me. ha!


{nine} what’s your favorite movie snack?
ummm popcorn, duh!


{ten} do you scream on roller coasters?
no, i normally start laughing hysterically

picture perfect

Hooray for retail therapy! Okay so today I went shopping after work. Normally people use retail therapy when they're stressed or upset but me? No I just used it because people at work cut my nerves! So anyways moving onwards! I first stopped by Dick's Sporting Goods and bought a Titan's t-shirt as well as some cute little shorts! Oh yes, this coming Sunday's game is going to be watched in total comfort. (Unless I have a smelly guy standing near me at the game, that's not exactly comfortable...) I then stopped by Best Buy to price check some cameras, ended up leaving because no one even offered to help me price check... rude. So I then stopped by Wally World and dropped by the electronics department and not one but two people asked to help me... that's what I'm talking about people. So I ended up walking out of there with a lighter wallet and a new digital camera! Score. Okay so I didn't go full out and by an SLR or anything, really the only reason I even went to get one is because I wanted a smaller camera that was less bulky than the one I already own.

via
I ended up going with a simple digital camera, nothing fancy-shmancy. I wasn't looking to spend over $150 because I know I'll eventually want to get an SLR and really all I needed this one for was to take to Titan's games and what-not. (my other camera is bulky so it was always taking up too much room in my purse) Furthermore I bought the Kodak EasyShare M530. It's small and cute and does everything I need it to...which is simply take pictures and load them to my computer lol, nothing too high tech. Though I may have only spent $108.57 (not to be precise or anything?) it actually takes a lot better pictures then my $200 something camera that's fat and inconvenient! Yes, you read correctly I just called it fat. heh...

-Next Subject-
So today I didn't go into work until 10AM and only had a five hour work day, what's even better is tomorrow is a repeat of the same. Talk about vacation! Ahhh heavennnn! (As I was typing this I get a phone call from work telling me that in the morning I need to have enough food made for 300-400 people. Um ez-cuse me? Oh the life of a pro-caterer! HA!)

So anywho, be on the look out for day 3 of 10 Days of Digging Deeper! =)

OH! and Ps. Has anyone read 'Why Men Love Bitches' by Sherry Argov? A while ago I had a friend tell me about it and tell me about how good it was but I can't think about who it was that told me nor can I think about what all she said. So if you've read it, let me know your thoughts!

Wordless Wednesday v.1

10 Days of Digging Deeper has been interupted to bring you my first, Wordless Wednesday!



Because you know you can't look at that without laughing.

10 Days of Digging Deeper v.2

Welcome back to my series 10 Days of Digging Deeper! Today's prompt is: (drum roll, anyone....anyone?)

Name 10 of your most favorite qualities in your mate -or- 10 qualities that you hope to find in your future mate.

Obviously I'll be listing 10 qualites I hope to find in my future mate. :)


via
I would love for my future husband to have a great listening ear. I've never really had that in a relationship before, but to have someone really listen to me would probably be one of the best gifts.


AH! I am going to HAVE to marry a man that loves dogs! I'm 100% against animal cruelty, I think it's worst then human-to-human cruelty because unlike humans, animals can't speak for themselves, nor defend themselves...okay they can bite but that's not the point! Anyways, back to subject! A man that can love a dog has a sensitive side, and every woman should love that ;)


I would love for my mate to have a kind heart. Someone that cares about others, always has everyones best interest at heart. Wouldn't hurt a fly, however wouldn't let anyone run over him.


Loyalty. I think that's self explanatory. Loyalty is an extremely important quality and character trait.


To me this is one of the most important qualities that I could find in a man. The ability to act like a kid. Two kids in love. Rainy days spent coloring in coloring books, playing monopoly, or even go fish. The ability to ask me to play in the rain with him or even roll around in dirt. That's what is one of the most important qualities to me. I feel like if he has the ability to act like a kid our relationship won't have a dull moment. hehe


I love to life so this is almost a necessity. Okay, it definitely is. Fart in front of me and I'm able to fall off the bed laughing. That's just the way I am. I'll have a burping contest, or even dutch oven you... okay that's a joke lol. But seriously I love to laugh so this is definitely important to me. :)


I love love love to cuddle. I'm a big time cuddle-bug! hehe So basically it would be pretty bad ass to have a cuddle-bug man ;)


A family man. I am obviously an extremely family oriented chica and I would definitely want the same from my hubbs. Family has always meant a whole lot to me and if me and Mr. Man (of my dreams) were to decide to have a child or children, for that matter, I would sure hope that both of us (not just me) are highly involved in our child(rens) lives. --but not that overbearing kinda involvement, I would like for them to be able to breathe at the end of the day.


I definitely need a man that can inspire me, in many different aspects of my life. I want someone to inspire me to be the best I can be in my work, my religion, my family, and my relationship. Inspiration is definitely important to me and I hope that I can do the same for him.


Last but not least, the most important of all: a religious man. If a guy won't go to church with me, I want no part in him. I without a doubt want a Godly man. To me, a relationship won't last that's not built on a firm Godly foundation.

Ps. Dude, where are you!?


I hope some of ya'll join in, I'm excited to see what others say :) Till next time, my lovely readers...

10 Days of Digging Deeper v.1

There has been so much on my mind lately that I feel like I can't even focus on one thing for too long! Talk about madness, I feel like my mind has gone into overload. Hence me being away for a week. However I have been mad crazy at work! Anywayssss... I woke up this morning thinking to myself, how did I get here? Ya, ya I'm not talking about none of that birds and bees stuff lol. If you would've asked me five years ago if this is where I would be standing today, I would have said no.

With that being said, I've decided to start a 10 day series, "10 Days of Digging Deeper". Each day will have a different prompt that digs a little deeper into who YOU are, and how you got to that point. I've always wanted to know more about the blogs I read and I find this to be a perfect way to get to know your readers and let them get to know you a little better. Teehee :)

Without further adieu, I present to you the first prompt:
Name one of the best times in your life.

By far one of the best times I have ever had in my life was when I went on Spring Break to Panama City Beach, Florida. I have never felt so free and careless in my entire life (okay, so this could be due to the large quantity of alcohol being consumed, but that's not the point!) My mom, E, B, and I roomed together but considering that's basically college kids stomping ground during SB I knew quite a few (understatement) people. Every day we would wake up accompanied by orange juice and tylenol. Maybe after 30 minutes of us attempting to wake up we would put on our bikinis load up our coolers and travel down to the beach! Once we were at the beach, we oiled up and passed out! haha. Around 4PM we would head back up to the room to eat lunch/dinner and we would shower and get ready, with beer/martini in hand of course! After getting ready at night we would head out to the clubs (don't worry, we always had a taxi). We normally rolled in at about 4AM and then go to bed and wake up the next morning at 8AM and repeat. Sobriety was very limited the entire time but I have never had such a carefree vacation in all my life. No drama, no school, no work, nothing. Just alcohol, sun, beach, and friends. I don't think you could get a better combination then that!

Now for pictures! Warning: Picture Overload.


This is a picture we took while pregaming before heading out to the club :) Oh ps. not for children to see.


Me and one of my best friends, apparently the same night hence the shirt.


HA! Funny story about this one. One night we all drank a little too much (understatement) and we all woke up hungover. However, that night I had a dream about funneling beer so when I woke up the next morning I figured why not have the breakfast for champions! College years, what can I say?


Me and E before we headed out to soak up some sun ;)


Me and B... you like my chub? You would think that I would at least be sober enough to remember to suck in the tum tum. Obviously not. PS. If you zoom in, you can see my the tip of my tattoo on my waist line.


Pool=Love. You can't see it in this picture because it was taken too early in the morning, but there's actually three waterfalls in the pool. Ah it was BA.


The Crew


I'll stop posting pictures now before it gets graphic! HA! Just kidding, of course. Might I add that I am NOT an alcoholic. Okay, one may beg to differ at the time when we were there, but it's spring break! Everyone gets wild! lol.

Anyways, if ya'll decide to join in the 10 days of digging, feel free to leave a comment so that others can check your digging out! ha, I'm so cheesy.

rant, with a capital R

Well, today...I've decided to just rant about random things, shocking right? HA!

-Is it me or is this year going by too fast? My mom is currently sitting next to me singing jingle bells while looking at a Christmas decor magazine. Maybe she's just crazy but ya know, I love her lol.

-I'm beginning to think I have a shopping issue. I love "stuff" too much. Maybe I need to reevaluate my priorities.

-I'm actually beginning to think that I need to reevaluate a lot of things.

-I don't write in my personal journal nearly enough. I use to write in it like crazy! Where is all the time going?

-Every since I took a step up at my job, I feel like I don't have time to do anything. Half the stuff I want to accomplish never gets done due to my busy schedule. I need to find some sort of balance.

-Where is a 20-something-single-female suppose to meet her prince charming? (Obviously not a bar nor club) My dating life is none existant and I would like to change that. However I don't have any friends to meet guys through nor do I have much of a social life... well this is looking like a dead end road. :sigh:

-I need to ban myself from getting on facebook. Everyone is getting married and having babies and everytime I see this I almost get angry, thank God there's never a knife around me or I would probably start stabbing the computer screen. :joke... i'm not that crazy! haha:

-I need to figure out what I want to do with myself. I keep asking God for signs whether it be to stay working for my dad (and forever be under his thumb) or to take a chance on getting my education degree (i say chance, because i'm scared I won't like being a teacher... yet I would love to do it...)

-Is it obvious to anyone that I need a lot of answer? :sigh: I just wish things were easier and came easier. I miss the good ol' days when the hardest thing I had to worry about or even do was making sure I picked out the right outfit for picture day in school!

-end rant-

a heated conclusion

Did anyone watch the Titans VS. Steelers game yesterday? What a bummer. The first play (Pittsburg) pretty much set the tone. I would start to think we were getting somewhere, and then of course it was a set back. I had a feeling the game was going to be a tough one, but I'm just happy it was anything like 50-0... that would've sucked. However I'm going to blame it all on the heat. It was absolutely miserable outside. Anyone drinking beer really felt it afterwards, that's a definite! By the time I got home I was so dehydrated it wasn't even funny and even J didn't feel too good. There was also talk about how yesterdays game could possibly be the hottest weather to be played in. I think I can agree, I haven't been in heat like that since I can't tell you when. Literally, my skin felt like it was catching on fire, hence why we left during the third quarter.

After yesterday, I really believe that J and I are going to remain as friends. He made a joke during tailgating when a van pulled up and blocked our view. "Great, now I can't check out that gymnast looking chick" :insert ego crash, confidence failure, and blow to the heart: By that point I brushed it off and said to hell with it. I can't keep longing for something that will never be, which of course that small ounce of hope with still reside in the back of my head. I have to move on from all this. I'm refrain from all communication right now. I'm not going to text him or anything unless he texts me first and even with that there will only be a limited response back. Maybe I'm starting to put up my walls and maybe that's not the best thing to do but right now it doesn't matter anymore. I don't want to feel for him the way I do so therefore I'm pulling back.

However I do want to thank the two that responded to my last post. ("What if?") I really took in what ya'll had to say. Yet by the 'signs' of yesterday I just don't ever see much coming out of it, unfortunately. Yesterday was what I have been waiting for, some clear sign. Even though he may have been joking, I know without a doubt that I'm not the girl he has his eye on. With that being said, I do hope that one day my prince charming will find me. I long to be a wife and a mother, and I definitely know that I will not feel complete until I am. Just like my mother, I know I was meant to take care of someone(s). Hopefully one day, I will be able to do just that.

what if?

I just finished watching the movie Letters to Juliet. The beginning, in my opinion, is somewhat rocky. However if you continue to watch it, it will definitely become a tear jerker! If you've seen this movie, then you'll follow where I'm going with this quote.



"What and If are two words as non-threatening as words can be. But put them together side-by-side and they have the power to haunt you for the rest of your life: What if? What if? What if? "

All of a sudden I'm asking myself the question "what if?" in reference to J. All along we've been friends yet all along I've wanted to be with him. I've never expressed my feelings towards him to him. So now my question is this, what if? What if I were to tell J how I really feel? With me being a hopeless romantic I want to say that he'll have the biggest smile on his face in the world and tell me he's wanted to tell me the same all along. However, realistically I can only see him and our friendship grow distant and isolated. What if I never told him? Is it possible that what could have been could never be? Do I really want to take the chance on risking everything?

I've talked to a select few about the situation yet everyone says the same thing, tell him. Why can it not be that easy? I'm in a complete battle with myself. Do I risk losing a friendship because he doesn't feel the same? Would I rather keep him as my friend because I rather cherish having him in my life then not having him at all? Do I keep quiet, continue to be just a friend, and always have that constant reminder of what will never be? Honestly, if I were to tell him how I felt only to find out the he doesn't feel the same I don't know if I could still be his friend. I think the sharp end of the knife would cut too deep and too fast for me to ever be able to communicate with him the same. Yet what if he's fighting in the same battle? What if he feels for me yet is too nervous to say anything? J is a pretty shy guy when it comes to stuff like this.

I've shed so many tears over this whole matter that I should probably buy stock in some Puffs Plus. I don't want to battle this anymore. My patience is wearing thin. I just want him to confess his love for me tell me how he really feels or at least show some sort of clear (like, windexed windows clear) sign of whether or not he's at least into me.

Relationships are never easy. Friendships, romance, and even family... none of them come easy. However, this time I really wish God would lay out a blue print for me and help a clueless, hopeless romantic girl out.

Let's pull out some Dr. Phil, let me know what you think I should do. Right now I could use any type of advice.

Hope everyone had a fabulous friday!

football fun

Hooray! Pictures from this weekends Titans games.. oh ya know the one where the Tennessee Titans decided to beat some Oakland Raiders ass! Heck yes. That one :)

Anyways, we (J and I) decided to tailgate with a party of two, him and I, before the game. Two hours later we left the parking lot and went inside the stadium to cheer on our team.


Meet J. Has anybody put two and two together that this is the first ever reveal of J? If you don't know much about J, read back to previous posts. Simply put: We've been friends since high school, and well, I'm crazy about him. (and he doesn't even know it).


J & I. You'll have to excuse our sweatiness. It was an absolute scorcher out!


L & I. L is my partner in crime when it comes to the games. Considering we sit in a male infested zone, we help each other survive the testosterone overload. However, we're always defeated. :)


I absolutely love this picture. It's basically the definition of our friendship. :)


Okay, so let's take it back high school style shall we? This picture excites me just for the fact that later, after the game, I actually did get a kiss. ::SQUEALS WITH EXCITEMENT!:: We're just that nerdy ;)

I've been to tons of football games over the years. Whether they be professional, college, or high school level... I've been to more then I can count. However, I have never had as much fun at a game as I did with J on Sunday. I really can't even explain it.

I just hope I can have a repeat again this weekend. :)

postie time, baby!

The death of...

my old satellite, could not be any sweeter!

I swear I didn't die! However, my internet did! We had a little tiff with the satellite company because unlike most people we don't get the luxery off DSL living out in the boonies and all. However, a different just launched a new satellite and what not so now my internet is faster, thus meaning faster, easier, MORE POSTS! And all along I thought it was my computer... shame, shame.

Anyways a lot has been going on, as always lol. J and I went to the Titans game this past Sunday against the Raiders... you know I was struttin' my blue & red when we laid that ass whoopin down! Anyways, I have pictures and what not to share but for now I'm just going to make a quick, hehe because I now can, post so that way I'm not draggin in the morning when I have to get up super early!

I miss you all, hopefully this time around I'm back... FOR GOOD!

PS. Summer- I've never stopped praying sweet girl!

Dear you, yes you....

Dear newspaper,
I really wish you would remove the wedding section. You see, I'm addicted to your wedding stories. They always make me so giddy and then I start thinking of all my failed relationships, and well... you know where this is going.
Sincerely,
Hopeless romantic.

Dear C,
You see, were suppose to work as a team. However I'm carrying all the weight. I don't appreciate that nor do I appreciate the fact that you bad mouth me to our other "ones". So if you could clean up your "high school" attitude and "high school" approaches I would greatly appreciate.
Sincerely,
Your co-worker.

Dear M,
I'm sorry that you feel that all my time should be consumed by you. Unfortunately I am going on 22 and I have other priorities in my life. However that doesn't seem to phase you. I also don't appreciate the night that you thought I was asleep and you talked about me right in front of me. However I was awake and heard what you and D were saying and to be honest, I cried about what you said and now I know to not put all my trust and faith in you.
Sincerely,
The betrayed.

Dear D,
I don't appreciate you treating me like an idiot. Nor do I appreciate the previously mentioned bad mouthing that took place when you thought I was asleep. Honestly you could be the biggest prick I have ever known. However I'm still there for you and you greatly take that for granted. One day I hope you see all that I do and you feel like the biggest ass-wad in the world.
Sincerely,
The "brain dead", as you like to refer to me as.

Dear A,
Oh my gosh, guess what!! The world doesn't revolve around you, ge you head out of your ass and see the big picture.
Sincerely,
Bitch.

Dear J,
Oh don't think I forgot about you. I'm on a roll here buddy. I really wsh you would quit pulling my heart strings and let me figure you out. That hug you gave me last ngbt is still lingering on my mind. And somehow I hate it. Get ou of my head and let me go on with my life. I don't feel like feeling for you anymore. It takes to much strength and I don't have much more to give.
Sincerely,
The toy.

Dear AH,
I hate that you use me, then dispose of me. Well thats to your own expense honey. I'm done with that now. You should have wised up. Your relationship once again went down the drain, feel stupid now? Feel like a dumbass throwing everyone else away? You should.
Sincerely,
The disposed

Anyone feeling my anger roaring? I'm normally not an angry person at all but here lately I have been failed repetitively and now all the odds are weighing against me and yes, my anger has finally exploded. One can only take so much before the ball drops and unleashes.

Lighter note, Happy Sunday!

the facts of life.

A few things have been dangling over my head lately. As soon as I wash away the little danglers, the damn things come back. All I keep thinking about it how basically, I have no one. Everyone I know, literally, has a boyfriend, husband, fiance, child... you get the picture. I have none of the above. I'm not saying I take my family for granted, because I assure you, I don't. But I still think it would be nice to have that special someone, something, that makes me individual from my family. Maybe 'individual' isn't the right word, but I know what I mean by it. For example, my sister has Justin and Jacob. She has her own life apart from my parents. Whereas, I feel like I'm just a 'floater'. Maybe these feelings were tapped into when I went to my fourth baby shower in less than a year. I have another one that'll be approaching soon, and once again in all selfishness, I'm less than thrilled. I know I should be happy for these people, however I can't help but to wonder when it's going to be my turn. Of course, I prefer 100% to be married first... yet that's not even on a jump start yet. Going on 22 and single. Honestly if you would've asked me a couple of years ago if I would be 22 and single I probably would've laughed in your face. I probably would have replied with a smirky comment a long the lines of, "me, 22 and single? haha ya right, I'll be on my way to Tiffany's!"

Negative.

I know what they say, good things come to those who wait. Well guess what? That's the wrong thing to say to someone who's extremely impatient. I have gave what little patience I have a go, and it quickly made me more panicky. I'm not saying that being in my 20's and single is a horrible thing, but for me I would like to start that special something with that special someone. It's just not happening anytime soon.

Especially since my heart is torn over J and I can, clearly, not get him off my mind. Saturday night update: We didn't really talk much. My sister, BIL, and J talked the majority of the time while I sat all clammed up. I wish I could just be myself, that's the person that J originally became friends with. So why is this so hard? Like honestly, I feel like a little high school teeny bopper. Even more honestly, it SUCKS! I need to stop being so hung up on him. I need to come back down to earth and acknowledge the facts. The facts of life.

What, why?

I haven't seen J in a couple of weeks. My feelings have faded and I try to forget about them all together. However he's on his way here and all I can think about is that gut wrenching feeling that won't go away. I have that pressure in my chest that makes me feeling like my heart is on the verge of exploding. Why now? Why couldn't I have already gone through the emotions? Instead I'm trying to sit here and ignore them and putthem in the back of my head with every chug of beer I take. I feel like I can't even interact with him anymore without being wierd. Possibly cause we were friends for so long and so close and now all of a sudden my heart wants to mess everything up.

Now he's here and I don't know what to do or say except to end this blog post and try to pull myself together.

Hmph.

soul search, or something like that

I've come to the realization that I've lost a lot of readers. Though I still have followers, not many read anymore. I don't know how I should feel l about this but I can't be upset. I haven't been able to post like I want to. My schedule is crazy nuts, but I feel as though that excuse can only run so far. However I'm looking into purchasing a new laptop. Actually a Mac to be precise. My PC is more of a hassle than any sort of enjoyment. It's slow, it's clogged, it's not what I need it to be. Furthermore, I'm working on a solution! So hopefully that will help me back to blognation. It would cut my posting time in half which I seriously need!

Anyways. Moving onwards...

My weight has been bothering the piss out of me lately. I hate that I let myself get this out of shape. I've never been this...this... Oh what's the word.... LARGE before. I find myself tossing and turning at night not being able to shift my weight to a comfortable position. When I do get to that position it only lasts so long. Scientifically speaking I don't know if that's the proper term or not, but I'm not obese nor am I too far over weight. But I'm personally uncomfortable in my skin. I want to buy clothes and get excited about it instead of worrying. When I use to be in shape, I'm not gonna lie, I was pretty damn fashionable. I want that weight back. Now the decision. Yes, I want to lose weight but where am I suppose to find my motivation? With my crazy work schedule it's hard to think about exercising and healthy choices. Somehow I have to find a drive within me. I was actually jus reading a blog where they had pictures posted and I couldn't help but to be overwhelmed with jealousy! I'm never really a jealous person, so this is where this post comes into place. I need to reevaluate who I am as a person and what I want from my life. I think by digging down to the source of my problem(s) will somehow help develop that drive that I want and need.

So wth this being said, I ask that you pray for me as I go on a journey to finding myself and realizing my true wants, desires, and drives in my life.

A VS. J

I've recently found someone that I think is pretty special. Well, actually I've been catching up with that person that I think is really special. However, what happends? The game that all single 21 year old single females hate. This special person is J. He's hilarious, he has a lot of qualities that I would expect to see in my future husband, and needless to say extremely charming.

Then there's A. I met A through work and became acquainted with him. Eventually it led to interest. However the more I got to know A the more I wish I didn't know A and the more I wanted to get away from A. (However, he works next door to me... real convenient, eh?)

So the game? A wants to be with me, I want to be with J, and J isn't interested in more than friends. SERIOUSLY! I have tried my patience. I know that God has someone planned for me but seriously, for some reason I can't stop thinking about J. I literally think of him all day long like a little girl in high school... it's rather ridiculous with a twist of irony because that's where I actually met J.

Story of J:
It was my senior year and I absolutely hated the school I attended. I got to my fourth period class and was ready to shoot somebody. In walks J, at the time my best friend that just so happened to be in the same class sitting right next to me called him hot boy. (insert giggles). At the time I was with my high school sweetheart and had been for a year and a half. (whom lived an hour away and went to a totally different school) So here's this new kid that is fine as hell, i'm not available however would like to pounce on him like a cheetah in high tops... yes... i just said that. Continuing onwards! J is seated across the walkway from me and all I can do is stare at him through algebra. Eventually we got a new seating arrangement and guess what? I was placed right behind J who sat right beside M (my friend) who sat beside L (best friend) who sat beside me. So there the foursome sat. The back of his head looked just as good as the front... hahaha ok jk anyways. So we all started talking. J and I ended up bonding and becoming pretty good friends but remained just as that because I was in a committed relationship. *Drum Roll* Boyfriend and I breakup. J knew I was somewhat upset but trying to keep my head up about it so he invited me over after school. We sat in his basement for about an hour before I had to leave for work as he walked me out to my car he pushed me against the hood and gave me the most passionate kiss I've ever had in my 18 year old life. Yet, we remained just friends because he was starting to get involved with another girl prior (don't worry it wasn't serious though).

Fast forward: over the past 2 years we've lost contact due to this girl. Turns out they dated for a long while and eventually she got pregnant. A year later, this past October of 09, after many suspicions a DNA test confirmed it wasn't his. In early July J contacted me on Facebook and ended up apologizing for his shadiness that took place throughout our loss of contact. We've now been hanging out every weekend, because during the week our schedules conflict. The more I'm around him the crazier about him I get. I keep thinking that nothing happened between us before because it just wasn't the right timing. Now J has informed me that he doesn't want a relationship for a long time because he wants to finally live the life that he didn't get to for a whole year. I can't say I blame him, but I just wish he felt for me the way I felt for him. I feel like that pretty reasonable thinking for a single 21 year old female that is absolutely nuts about a guy. However, that's not in the works for me right now.

I just wish I knew who my soulmate is. I'm so curious and anxious that I don't want to wait, however I question myself if I'm really ready for that right now in my life. As my mom always says, it'll work out in the wash.

Life as I now see it

I don't know if it has anything to do with my grandmother passing or not, however here lately I have been coming to many accurate conclusions and learning alot about not only myself but life in general. I'm not going to type out a long elaborate/detailed post of these conclusions but I will leave them in a list form.

1. I have realized that you can trust no one in life. The people whom you regard as your friends are not always their true title. People will use and abuse you to further themselves, not only in the work environment but in life as well. Take a look at the people whom you call your friends, look at the time you spend with them... if it's only at their own convenience, drop them. Obviously you weren't that important to them in the first place. Not only this but you can now spend more time with those who actually love to be around you even if it's inconvenience to them... it's just what they prefer.

2. Stick by your faith, in the end it's all you've got.

3. Give God your all, and he will provide you with his.

4. Rid of all negative in your life. It's rather empowering once you do.

5. Stay close to your loved ones. Stay true to yourself. You never know when your last ray of sunlight will be.

I know all of this has been spoken many times before me, and will occur many times after. However, I want this to be a reminder to everyone reading this to live your life. Don't let others pull you down, down let the worldly ways get in the way of what God's plan is for you, and if you don't know yet, just keep believing. Our time is so short on earth and we take it for granted way to often if not all the time.


*Quick reminder: With July coming to an end and August knocking at the door, I will be featuring a new blog of the month. However, I haven't been able to get on as frequently so I don't know which blogs to look out for, therefore if you're interested in being featured, please send me an e-mail. Also, this round I will be having the featured blogger do a guest post. [excitinggg!] Don't be shy! I won't know to look at your blog if you don't knock on my door ;)

It's MIRACULOUS!

Okay, so I don't know if everyone has heard about the Victoria Secrets Miraculous Bra, but seriously, woah diva! I can't even count how many bra's I've purchased over the years try to find that perfect lift and shift for my boobies. I have finally found just that. If you notice in most "push-ups" they have a padding in one of two places on the outter rim of the cup or in the lower bottom of the cup. Not this bad boy. The MB has two pads in both places. When they say you move up two cup sizes, they're not lying. Why buy boobies from a doctor for a 1,000+ dollars when you can spend less than $60 on a bra. Not only is it cheaper, but your boobies can now be customized. Want small boobs for that one dress? You got it, just take the bra off and put your wal-mart bra back on. Don't worry I'm not shaming the fabulous wally world! But when you need that perfect cleavage, never fear my fellow diva's... victoria has your back!

Can anybody tell I loveee finding the perfect product for whatever need it may be? What are some of ya'lls favorite deals, products, etc?

Also I'm thinking about doing a guest blog post, anybody interested in being featured on The Diva Bee? Just send me an e-mail at thehaleybarr[at]yahoo[dot]com. I'll then give you a list of themes you can choose from.

Hope everybody's having a happy Sunday!

Quote of the Week

Life and Death

I don't really know how to start this post off. I have no clever lines nor wit. All I have is facts. Fact: my grandmother is in the hospital and though no one will admit it to me, I know that it's possible she's laying on her death bed. Every week is up and down. She's doing good. She's not doing so good. But no one will tell me the truth of what's really going on. I don't blame them, I tend to not be able to handle serious circumstances without going into a depression. I mourn day in and day out. I'm sure they're all just tryin to protect me. However for some reason I know without a doubt what's going on and somehow I'm at peace. I'm not going to try and fight God's will. I'm not going to pray for her life, because if it's in His will to have her with him I can't fight that. My prayers are constantly filled with me asking God to do as he pleases and to not let me be selfish. Fact: I will be upset if she doesn't walk out of those hospital doors. Fact: I cant control the situation so I need to trust Gods plans.

This is just one more reminder for me to not let my days go by without thanking God for all his many blessings. Life is a blessing that many days goes unappreciated. We take our blessings for granted so much that it disturbs me for the simple fact that I'm constantly doing so myself. In the movie public enemies Clark Gables famous line was presented "Die like you live". Many of times I hear live like your dying but when I heard this it got my thought process in action. I personally don't want to die in pain and suffering. Therfore why should I live that way. The outcome of my pondering led me to this: I need to laugh more, I need to smile more, I need to give more, and I need to love and experience more.

We only have so much time. I want to make use of it the best way I can all the meanwhile holding Gods hand.

Quote of the Week

Blog of the month goes to...

Bailey at Addicted to Addison!



If you've never read her blog before, nows the time that you should! She's always making posts filled with adorable pictures of Addison, her little girl. She's always so nice and needless to say she's an amazing blog designer! I mean... just look at my fabulous blog! Haha.

So Bailey, here ya go.. here's your lovely award for you to post :)

QOTW

http://i811.photobucket.com/albums/zz33/thedivabee/Quote_GreekProverb.jpg

BOTM- June10

Anybody notice what has not taken place this month? Anybody?


BLOG OF THE MONTH!
Everybody knows that I've been on blogcation for basically the whole month of June. Due to this, I really don't want to list a BOTM just so they can have it for a few days til Miss July steals the glory. Therefore, I won't be having a month of june :'(. Sorry Miss June, whoever you may be! Stay tuned on July 1st! It could be you. And we all know how seriously important it is and what a huge achievement it is to recieve a BOTM from The Diva Bee, you might as well be walking down the red carpet! Haha, or not. Anyways, BOTM will resume July 1st. ;)

For those of you just now reading, Ms. May was Summer @ Summer's Story. Check her out, she's a doll!! ;)

1000 Random Fact Pt 3

Welcome to part tres! I pre-apologize if you get bored with reading. I'll be doing double the facts. How intriguing! ;)

Pt. 3: 101-200
101. I listen to rap. Hardcore rap. Boom boom stuff.
102. I get giggly when thinking about love, sometimes depressed.
103. I love HGTV. Mainly House Hunters and Property Virgins.
104. Speaking of virgins, I lost my virginity my sophomore year in high school. Oh watta hoe! HA! Jk.
105. I lit and took a hit off of my first cigarette when I was 8 years old.
106. I've been a smoked cigarettes since my junior year in high school.
107. I've had 7 cellphones. 2 being iPhones. 3g and 3gs of course ;)
108. I decided to trip shrooms my sophomore year in college. It didn't work right and I ended up with a delayed trip that lasted 3 months. Hello white cats and black rabbits EVERYWHERE. *Do not ever try this... it's stupid and irresponsible.
109. When I was 12 years old I spent my summer's going to work with my mom. (She's a cosmetologist) I would sweep hair and wash out perms and stock... and made pretty good money.
110. I never talked until I was 3 years old, I only grunted.
111. I'm generally shy, however with age I come more out of my shell.
112. My father and I didn't have a relationship til I was 14 years old. We had the same temper so we only pissed each other off... long story will elaborate later.
113. If I could tan everyday of my life I would. However I'm quite pale.
114. I've spent a week straight drunk. Literally never sober once. Hey, it was spring break in PCB... don't judge me :-P
115. I hate confrontation but I'm not one to let it overcome me.
116. The day before I start my monthly present I cry.. it never fails.
117. When driving my seats vibrate from my bass. I wouldn't have it any other way.
118. I live in the country music capital, yet I hated country up until about 2 years ago.
119. Born and raised in Tennessee.
120. I'm determined to visit Delaware.
121. " " Maine.
122. " " New Brunswick
123. " " Chicago
124. " " New York
125. " " LA
126. " " San Fran
127. " " St. Lucia
128. " " Mexico
129. " " Miami
130. " " New Hampshire
131. " " North/South Carolina
132. " " Washington
133. I have several e-mail addresses. As soon as I start getting too much junk mail, I make a new one. Retarded I know.
134. I'm 21 with a curfew.
135. I'm hot natured.
136. When I was younger, before I discovered contacts, everytime I got mad I broke my glasses. I had anger issues apparently.
137. I love getting out of the shower and letting my hair air dry.
138. My mom randomly tells me she's going to beat me with something, always some sort of random object... fly swatter, spatula, newspaper.... I know her love for me is overwhelmingly obvious. lol.
139. I'm a true believer that music speaks where words fail.
140. I know how to carry on a convo about politics.
141. I'm a republican that boarderlines me neutral. I don't vote based upon whether or not they're a rep or dem, I vote for the candidate who I find to be best for office.
142. Aka. I think Sarah Palin is a dumbass.
143. FEMINISTS GET READY TO BE OUTRAGED: I don't believe a female should be able to run for president. I feel it's a mans job... women are too emotional. They have a bad period and next thing we know we're blowing up china because she had a hot flash. No Bueno.
144. I randomly speak spanish.
145. I think spanish is a beautiful language and it's very under appreciated.
146. I'm an impatient person.
147. My taste in music is very diverse.
148. Yes, this means I randomly jam out to bluegrass. WHAT UP! :)
149. I practiced playing flip cup before I ever played with a group of people. Just so I wouldn't look like a jack ass of course!
150. On a school night we decided to play water pong instead of beer pong... just because we wanted to play. lol
151. I love playing sports
152. However, I'm not athletically inclined at all... except for softball.
153. I won 5 trophies in one season of softball.
154. If you put my iPod on shuffle I assure you, you will run into some Britney Spears and Dean Martin. hehe
155. I love blueberry pancakes and waffles!!
156. I don't really like candy unless I randomly crave it at that certain time of the month.
157. Actually I'm not a fan of sweets alltogether.
158. I refuse to shop at Abercrombie and Hollister. I find it to be overrated.
159. I hate when girls pretty much buy whatever was on the mannequin, it shows lack of creativity.
160. My iTunes has 2107 songs at this current moment in time. I don't even have all my music loaded. hehe.
161. My favorite movies of all times are Blow
162. Garden State
163. American Pie's
164. Sex and The City
165. PS I love you
166. The Notebook
167. My favorite quotation comes from one a friend from high school, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Everyone has their own hell, whether they grow above that or not is up to them." JB
168. I have one tattoo. It's two nautical stars one on each hip bone. Black and pink with green stripes.
169. I like scarves.
170. I know how to knit.
171. I wish I knew how to sew.
172. I love scrapbooking.
173. I love writing.
174. I love it when guys wear suits.
175. I'm obsessed with the band Chiodos. check em out!
176. I love wearing dresses.
177. Bald guys turn me on.
178. I love gerber daisies.
179. I love watching the biggest loser, it makes me happy
180. I love summertime.
181. I hate winter.
182. I google anything and everything.
183. I'm addicted to caffiene.
184. I'm not a fan of Obama
185. I'm a regular at Starbucks.
186. I have a million lighters but everytime I need one I can't find one
187. I like to sleep with lots of pillows.
188. I'm really not a fan of wet grass.
189. I want to own a Mac computer super duper uber spectacularly bad.
190. I make up my own words.
191. I randomly switch letters in words that I try to say. Example: Is this clean or dirty comes out as is this dean or cirty?
192. When I write my number 4's and 8's I write them differently almost everytime. Don't ask. lol
193. I love Hardee's breakfast. Especially the biscuit and gravy!!
194. I live by Ch 4 News. I hate all other news stations lol
195. Not a fan of facial hair.
196. I love sitting outside listening to the crickets chirp
197. Out of all types of jewelry, bracelets are my least favorite.
198. I want to eventually own a chevy truck with suspensions. Because I'm just that redneck.
199. I have a tender heart. You tell me about somebody getting hurt, I assure you I'll follow it up with, "Bless their heart!"
200. I love me some fishin!


Fact: That was intense. Try coming up with 100 facts in one blog post, nottt easy. especially since I kept backspacing because I remember I already stated a fact in a previous fact-o-thon post! Hope you enjoyed... tooootles ;)

wait, the weekend is already over?

Happy Sunday :) I hope everyone had a good weekend, I know I sure did! Friday night of course I didn't do anything because I worked Saturday morning from 7-10am. However, Saturday night was spent at my sisters, again! lol. As I was on my way to her house she asked me to stop and get her some cigarettes so I pulled into the gas station and went inside. I got in line with two people in front of me. One of those people turned around, jaw hitting the floor, in total amazement. Turns out it was one of my ex's best friends. I haven't seen him in probably over a year, therefore we both had changed alot. For instance, he went from being chubby geek to built and handsome... just for the record. After a little small talk he told me it was good seeing me and that I looked good. After this, I knew my night was going to be entertaining. On my departure from the gas station my sister called and told me it was only going to be me and her and my BIL hanging out. I got to her house and we chatted for a bit only to be interrupted at the same time with text messages. Her's was from her friend Crissy informing her that she was on her way over with her latest arm candy and mine was from my high school crush saying that he had just got off work and he was headed that way. We went from no one coming over to a nice little gathering. Several beers later everyone departed except for J (high school crush). We went inside and sat on the couch and ended up hanging out til 5am. :) hehe okay yes I totally just giggled when typing that. Not that either of us have time for a relationship but it's always fun to fantasize. :) :)

Today we all came to my parents to swim. My mom had just bought a volleyball net for the pool... plus several other pool games. It was a lot of fun. I'm actually just now settling down. Thank God I have tomorrow off work! Especially considering last week was extremely stressful and tear-filled. I think it's fair to say this weekend made up for it though.

Quote of the Week {6/24/10}

Part II

More facts! Oh the craziness! Welcome to part two :)

part two: 51-100

51. I paint my toenails and two weeks later I pick the polish off.
52. I'm addicted to csi's law and orders and snapped. I swear I'm not a murderer.
53. My handwriting changes daily.
54. I love sleeping with alot of pillows.
55. I would poop my pants for someone if they offered in return to give me a MacBook pro.
56. I still sleep with my baby blanket that I've had since I was a fetus.
57. I can't stand the word moist and I somehow always catch myself sayin it.
58. The thesaurus is my best friend-- you better believe I have a thesaurus app on m iPhone!
59. Ambulance sirens make me sick to my stomach.
60. I sometimes become a hermit and I dont want anyone to talk to me or even look at me.
61. I didn't start my period til I was almost 16 years old. Wait tmi? Read on.
62. I love purses but I'm extremely peculiar about them.
63. If I could wear stilletos everyday then I would.
64. In highschool I woke up two hours earlier just so I could go to starbucks before school
65. I have too many paperback journals to count.
66. I've had a xanga, livejournal, and wordpress blog prior to my blogger.
67. I'm addicted to the iPhone app WeRule. Ok and MyTown :-P
68. I miss AOL and the sound of "you've got mail".
69. I always forget to use my camera when I do picture worthy events.
70. I love how big of a "bitch" and a smart ass Nancy Grace is.
71. I hate when my feet are wet. (minus the shower and swimming of course)
72. I'm allergic to all rasberry items. Lotion, the fruit, juice... Everything.
73. I'm clumsy as all get out.
74. I wear contacts and always forget to take them out.
75. I randomly feel the urge that I HAVE to go shopping.
76. I love to get my nails done and pedicures
78. I love to dance.
79. I could tell people all day long how to lose weight and it will work. Yet I have no motivation to do it myself.
80. Blog comments make me SO happy yet sometimes i get too lazy torespond at that moment. Don't lie you do too.
81. I learn how to dive every summer because the next summer I get a fear and can't do it without relearning it.
82. I have a Vera Bradley planner that I'm obsessed with.
83. I love trying on clothes.
84. I get really excited when I buy new shampoo or toothpaste.
85. I've always looked funny in tennisshoes. Yet it's apart of my work uniform.
86. I love cuddling...until I get hot then I get pissy. Lol
87. I think puttputt is the most god awful first date. See fact #73.
88. I had my first kiss in the 8th grade.
89. My phone is about to die. And that frustrates me.
90. I bite my nails.
91. I love filing cabinets.
92. Nothing is better then clean sheets and a freshly vacuumed carpet.
93. I haven't had many boyfriends. Probably not as many as an average 21 yr old would have.
94. At time I can be very awkward
95. When meeting someone new I'm shy, unless alcohol is involved. "Oh you name is Betty? Well your my new best friend!"
96. Sometimes I crack jokes about myself when deep down it bothers me like no other.
97. I require sleep much like a toddler.
98. I LOVE to decorate.
99. I've had 6 different roomates.
100. I Love whitening my teeth.

That's all for now! Til next time...

1,000 Random Facts About the Diva Bee P1

So I've made it my personal challenge to provide 50 Facts about myself. 50 Facts isn't hard, but my challenge goes further... I plan on randomly selecting posts where I display 50 facts, I'm not going to stop until I have 1,000 Random Facts about The Diva Bee.

Part 1: 1-50
1. I have blue eyes.
2. My natural hair color is blonde.
3. I have chemically changed my hair pretty much every color.
4. I start my morning off with coffee, later followed by a Mountain Dew
5. When I get sleepy I rub my feet together.
6. I love buying dishes.
7. My favorite color is green.
8. I was born December 16, 1988.
9. I have one sibling, her name is Ashley.
10. I'm the baby of the family.
11. My nephew means the world to me.
12. I've had one job in my entire life. I still work there.
13. I have a fascination with organizing objects. (baskets, shelves, etc)
14. When using the public bathroom I rip off the first foot of toilet paper and throw it away. (Hey, you don't know what that person had on their hands that used the potty before you!)
15. I can't sleep in clothes, I sleep in my undies.
16. I'm petrified of the number 6
17. My lucky number is four.
18. I've had four computers in my entire life.
19. I'm the only person that has ever attended a university in my family
20. I am a Titans fan, til I die!
21. I prefer beer over liquor.
22. The smell of vodka literally makes me sick.
23. I've never been able to fully commit to watching a whole tv series from point a to point b.
24. I've lived in three different cities, all in Tennessee.
25. I've had four car wrecks... don't worry they weren't all my fault.
26. I really love fashion, the only problem is my work schedule and uniform makes it hard to be fashionable.
27. Reformed anorexic. Wait, is that the right wording?
28. I claim my farts and laugh about it.
29. I have pee'd my pants... I'm not talking about childhood here.
30. I can't sleep if my dresser drawers are open or clothes are hanging out etc...
31. I love Sex and The City, I really want the entire box set. Aka, if you know anyone thats hosting a giveaway and the gift just so happens to be the whole series, please make sure I'm the first to know. (I can't bring myself to spend 200 some-odd dollars on it!)
32. I believe in God.
33. I love to read, ha if I ever get time
34. I smoke cigarettes. Camel Lights or Marlboro Lights, whatever is the cheapest.
35. I love to love.
36. I love a man in uniform.
37. I'm a pretty complex/difficult/complicated person
38. I love doing random quizzes.
39. Summer @ Summer's Story is by far my favorite blog buddy, she's so sweet who couldn't love her!! (Don't get me wrong, I love love love my other bloggy buds!!)
40. I love planting flowers
41. I can cook, just gimme the recipe!
42. I'm a talented painter, I just never have time to paint.
43. My dream job is a makeup artist
44. For some reason or another, I think cops are hot... don't ask!
45. I like to read the wedding stories in the Sunday's paper.
46. I'm addicted to The Sims
47. I've owned three cars: Lime green bug. Red Honda CRV, and my new Silver Honda Element.
48. I'm a shihtzu person. I love my dogs!!
49. I think I'm prettier when I'm tan.
50. I want to get married, not now, but eventually.

Stay tuned ;)

cuteness explosion

Hello hello! Anyone proud that I'm posting and it's not even a month+ since my last post? Lol, I'm just thankful I have time to sit here on my computer and do so. Anyways, I keep talking about the pictures I have that are exploding with cuteness... well now I'm going to finally post them for all to see! I don't blame you if you put them as your computer background... they are just that cute, or maybe I'm bias. So without further adieu:

So I went to my sister place this past weekend to spend the night and hangout with the ever so awesome Jacob Riley. The following morning I woke up and was watching TV only to see my BIL come in the room with Jacob on his shoulders, talk about adorable. Somehow Jacob had stripped his PJ shirt off and was being carried around in his little PJ shorts, seriously, who wouldn't want to just eat him up!

So later we dressed little Jacob up to go to Granny's. (My mom, of course) My dad is real big into hunting so he bought Jacob a little camo onesie. Well, my sister has never put him in it before and being the awesome aunt that I am, I decided it was time to strut his stuff camo style. Cute right? So cute that I had to get a picture... don't mind me and my goof face, it just kind of happened. :)

We got to my parents house and hung out for a while. A Jacob-nap later we went swimming. This is Jacob after he went swimming for his second time. :) hehe Yeah too cute, right?

So that's what I've been up to lately...err... Saturday anyways. I don't take pictures at work, not only because they would bore you, so therefore that's basically what I've been up to. More to come soon. :)